There really is no right or wrong answer to that question. It's all about fit, feel, and function. The perfect gun for my wife might be horrible for you.
(I currently am doing a custom assembly of various gun parts to make a shotgun for my wife. This will be her 3rd shotgun; she didn't like the first 2)
On average, women tend to be of smaller stature and have shorter arms than men. Such is the case with my wife. So we looked for a youth model, but most of those are 20ga. very few come in 12ga. To add to the problem she is also a lefty. It's been almost a year since we started on our quest for a left hand semi auto 12 gauge with a youth stock. Never did find one, thus began the custom build project.
Many women think that they should shoot a smaller gauge such as a 20 gauge, for more manageable recoil. But a better answer might be a semi auto which will absorb much of the felt recoil, or lighter loads such as Winchester feather lights. Remember a 20 gauge = less pellets = less broken targets. I can also tell you from experience, that I feel less recoil from my gas operated 12 gauge using a hot 8 shot loads than I can feel from a 20 gauge pump with standard 8 shot loads.
Bottom line; beg, barrow, or rent, as many different guns as you can first. Don't buy till you know what you need and want in a gun, in order to break targets and be comfortable while doing it. Nobody can tell you what would be a good gun for you, only you can determine that through experience.
TIP: When trying out different guns, take a small tape measure with you. Use it to measure the pull length of the gun. (The distance from the butt of the stock to the trigger) This tends to be a major determining factor for many women, especially those with shorter arms.
[ 03-28-2005, 01:58 PM: Message edited by: Jon Ramsey ]